Countdown to banding day

Monday, June 16, 2008

It's my party and I'll cry if i want too...or not

Yesterday 16th June was my 35th birthday. I am not having an age crisis but feel I should be according to comments. I feel like I have reached the age where people expect me to be "wierd" about my age and I am not. I am really happy with 35, it's my last fat birthday and i fell like I am getting to the point where I am comfortable with me and who I am.

It has taken some work. For example on Sunday night I realised for the first time, truely realised wholly and fully that 95% of the dissapointments in my life are caused by my expectations of people and them not living up to them hence the disapointment. Now here's the thing, I believe that I have too high expectations of people so that that they can't possibly live up to them and will of course let me down. Then I can go through the I'm obviously not worthy, not lovable etc cycle and reward, medicate and make myself generally feel better with food.

So my mission this week is to meet people where they are and to try not to put my expectations and my standards on other people. Hmm a tough call, not so much hard as different.

Happy 35th Birthday to me ....my last fat birthday bring on 36 I feel a party coming on.

1 comment:

Cat McKenzie said...

Hey Claire,

Happy birthday.

Gee, you really are doing some hard work, changing your thinking and your perceptions. You should be very proud of yourself and your level of self-awareness.

You really are well on your way to a whole new you. Congratulations.

Cat